Brielle June by Karissa Yeager.

Here is another guest blog I have been saving up! One of mine & Josh's bestest friends, match maker extraordinaire, fellow blogger, wife and mom to the most beautiful girl, Brielle June, Mrs Karissa Yeager. Karissa & her husband Jake's story of how their sweet Brielle made our life so much bigger and better is amazing. I am so thankful to have witnessed the power of this story first hand and now share it with the world alongside them. 

Jake grew up across the street from Josh in Coalinga. Instant best buds. Jake started dating Karissa sophomore year of high school and the rest is history. Josh, Jake & Karissa have always been best friends, and I knew Karissa from my best friend Kate, who was also from Coalinga.  Kate moved to Clovis just before I did - thank God, or I would have been friendless for the better half of 6th and 7th grade and missed out on one of the best friendships I have to this day. Any way, as Josh and I look back on the countless times that we could have met, we just laugh. God had such a bigger and better plan, with perfect timing that would sweep us both off our feet. Karissa actually messaged me a legitimate list of "10 reasons to date my best friend Josh" ... they were really good reasons. Both of us were not ready to be set up, and of course we just happened to run into each other at church a couple weeks later. The rest, is history. 

Both Kate & Karissa knew we would fall in love, get married and live happily ever after. Really though, none of us knew the blessing that our friendship would grow into. Karissa has truly become a sister to me, funny because we do look freakishly alike, but also, because our boys really are brothers. I couldn't ask for a better couple to share our crazy adventures through life with and have sleep overs with at any age. We shared the same joy as we both got our first babies, their Chocolate Lab Gatsby and our Pit / Aussie mix Greyson. And then, just before we were gonna tie the knot, we found out Jake & Karissa were pregnant. I'll let her take it from here...

Karissa Yeager

it's kind of amazing how this bitty six pound, fifteen ounce life can rock your world, can explode your heart, can make you suddenly feel God stronger than ever before.

after march 9th, 2013 at 10:17pm, there was no going back. i was done for.

Brielle June is precious because we all are, but Brielle June is precious because she is a beautiful testimony to God's love and power and to my love and humility.

on june 24, 2012 my sweet husband and i found out we were pregnant. that moment was magic. i'm talking a moment when the world gets blurry and your legs get jiggly, and you just wanna stop time and soak up every last drop of life's sweetness. on july 2nd, 2012 we were told that the baby was gone. the pregnancy was no good. i don't remember much more than crumbling. my legs got jiggly again, but the kind of jiggly that knocks you out cold. i felt my heart crush, my back buckle. i leaned over, short of breath and sobbed. i felt betrayed, by God and my own body. i felt broken. i felt guilty.

on july 3rd, 2012 i was wheeled into the OR and i received a D&C. i just felt wrong. i felt wrong everywhere about everything. i was desperate to get a do-over. i remember pleading with God inside my head. i was desperate to be a mama. i was pleading to Him. please, Lord. someday make me a mama. that day was awful, and so were the days that followed. i remained tired, sad, and bitter.

on july 11th, 2012, found myself clinging to God, my husband, and any last bit of strength i had left. we were in the emergency room at UC San Diego Medical Center. my pathology reports had come back with no fetal tissue. blood tests confirmed i was still pregnant...somewhere. my doctor suspected a tubal pregnancy. so there i sat. more terrified than i had ever been before. more exhausted. more angry. more helpless. i wanted my home, my mom, and my ovaries. i wanted a baby, for goodness sake. i still wanted that baby, and i just felt like i was never going to recover from any of the nightmare that my life was at that moment.

after hours of waiting, we were taken into a room, given an ultrasound, taken into another room, visited by a doctor, and it was there that i witnessed the biggest miracle of my life.

my stomach gets fluttery and my mind gets foggy just thinking about. the doctor told me that i was still pregnant. that the baby was alive, in my uterus. the baby was alive, and healthy, inside of me, right where it belonged.

doctors and nurses flooded in with nothing to tell me except that there was no explanation for what happened. it was simply a miracle. a beautiful miracle.

on march 9th, 2013 at 10:17pm i heard that sweet cry. she was here. my sweet and precious baby was here. i wanted her so badly. i pleaded for her. i pleaded, begged, prayed. now she is here.

there is no going back. she has my heart. i will never, ever be the same again. i love her so much it hurts me. i cry for her because i love her so. sometimes a lump forms in my throat when i hug her. when her cold, smooth, squishy cheek rests on my shoulder, when my lips touch her fuzzy head, when her body goes limp against mine. when she is completely at peace, completely content with my love and protection, thats when she gets me. it's moments like that that i am constantly longing for.

from the moment she became mine, God made sense. it's those moments when i'm down on my knees, when i'm reading those scriptures, when i'm loving that neighbor, and i'm completely at peace, completely content with His love and protection, that's when i get Him. that is what he is longing for.

i will never understand how much He loves me, how much He loves us. i can't even grasp how much i love her.

Brielle is a horrible napper, and sleeper in general. i have bruises on my arm from where she has pinched me. and more often than not, she pees everywhere the second i undo her diaper. regardless, my love for her is unconditional in the purest way. pinch all you want, little girl. pee on my favorite dress. never nap again. i love you.

and God is the same to us.

i sin. always. i am a gossiper, liar, and thief. but i am a child of God and to Him that is enough. i am pure and clean and precious.

i often think about the fact that one day Brielle will be 15. one day Brielle will want to dye her hair, to date someone we might not approve of, to listen to some music we can't understand. i will love her just the same, i can promise that. but i can also promise that she will forever be my six pound, 15 ounce perfect gift from God. she will be that answered prayer, that miracle that i will never deserve. she will always be that first cry, that sweet toothless smile, that girl that never naps. she will always be that fake cougher, that boob lover, that giggler at Gatsby, her chocolate lab. she will always be perfect. i will forever hold on to her innocence and purity.

i am so thankful that God made me a mama. i am more thankful that God made me a mama to Brielle June. she is everything i have always dreamed of. she has made mine and Jake's life richer than we ever imagined.

above all my gratitude and thanksgiving, i am humbled and blessed by God's love for me.

give thanks to the God in Heaven, for His steadfast love endures forever. psalm 136: 26

To follow Karissa and her gorgeous family, check out her blog !! 

childlike faith by Jamie Feliz.

My first ever, guest blog post! Let me introduce my girl, Jamie Feliz. 

In seventh grade, I had the pleasure of meeting Jordan Feliz in my p.e. class. We became instant buds. Jordan and I went all the way through high school together. I remember when he started dating Jamie sophomore year and thinking how beautiful she was. Turns out, while I hadn't met Josh yet, Jordan and Josh were friends through being in bands and playing together in high school, too. Fast forward years later, when Josh was going to meet up with Jordan to grab coffee, we realized we both knew the same curly haired cutie. Jordan was just about to marry Jamie, and he had always told me he thought me and Jamie would be really good friends. We finally set up a double date and the rest is history. They became our best buds that we did everything with. Our dogs, Lennon & Pancakes, are even boyfriend and girlfriend. 

I fell in love with Jamie. You can't not love her. She is so ridiculously stylish and sassy, and without fail she will have you on your butt laughing. She's truly one of a kind. Jamie & I got to work together at the salon until they recently moved to Nashville, where she did Billy Rae Cyrus's hair by the way. No biggie. We are so blessed by being besties with these guys. I am so lucky to call Jamie one of my favorites and to share one of her stories of watching her faith grow. She is original, quirky, funny, stunning, humble, creative, and easy going. I'm a huge fan. Hope you love hearing her heart as much as I do ...

Jamie Nicole Feliz

We've all been there. That place in time where the walls inside of you crack and your heart falls down into the pit of your stomach. Life as you've know it so far has completely changed. A moment unplanned, unexpected.. a reality check. Sometimes these moments hit you right then and there. The second his eyes met mine, I knew he was the one. He smiled at me and my heart started pounding and my throat got dry and from that moment on I never wanted to be even a rooms length away from him. 15 years old, a time in my life when I wasn't looking for anything or anyONE, and I found him.. and I couldn't live without him...unplanned...unexpected. It's only by God's grace & intervention that I have been undeservingly blessed to call Jordan's heart my own. I got the privilege of 7 years of dating the heck out of him before we finally tied the knot 2 years ago. A decision I haven't regretted for a second.

 Sometimes life throws you curve balls. Leaves you feeling.. blank. breathless. speechless. A car crashes, a gun fires, a line goes flat and you think everything is going to be ok. You think you're gonna get through this one unaffected. Until, a week later, you trip going down the steps, or you drop a glass plate, and your mouth goes numb and your hands start shaking and you fall to pieces. You crack, break, and realize that life as you know it will never be the same... unplanned...unexpected...a reality check. 

I remember one time in particular my world was turned upside down. It may not be everyone's ideal story, but its the one I feel like sharing. I'm being real here, so no judgement please.

As a little girl, I was brought up believing in God, knowing the stories of the bible, praying to Him at night, and celebrating Christmas and Easter. As a child, you believe what you're told and you don't question anything, because humanity hasn't taught you to doubt yet.

One day, I was running around town with my dad and our dog, Zeus. First to the pet store and then quickly to the grocery store. On our way home, I pulled out the dog brush we had picked up at our first stop so that I could brush Zeus in the backseat. It was one of those brushes that has a clip attached to the face of it, beneath the needles of the brush. After the brush has collected hair, you can pull up on the clip, which pulls up all the hair, and you are left with a clean brush. And, thats exactly what I was doing. Being in the car, I disposed of the excess hair by holding the clip outside the window so that the air rushing by could wipe the clip clean. Unexpectedly, the wind pulled the clip straight from my hand and I watched, in horror, as the clip flew onto the freeway behind us and underneath passing cars. Gone for good.

I'm sure we all remember, as a child, there is no worse feeling in the world than disappointing your parents. Knowing we JUST bought that brush, I knew my dad would KILL me if he found out what I'd just done. Immediately, I bowed my head and with all my heart, I prayed to a God that I knew was a God capable of miracles. I don't remember the words I said to Him, I just remember putting all of my faith into Him and knowing he was going to cover me.

We pulled into the driveway and my dad opened up the back to unload the bags. I grabbed the first few and as he reached in and pulled out the last two, there it was. Underneath the last two bags in the trunk was the clip to the brush. Speechless, my heart sank. "How did this get here?" my dad said, handed me the clip, and continued inside. That, to me, was a real reality check.

Over the years the world taught me a lot of things, one of them being doubt. But the one thing I never doubted was my belief in God, His love, and His ability to make His presence known in our lives as long as we continue to have child-like faith in Him and not do ourselves a dis-service by assuming what He is/is not capable of doing in our lives. For years I kept that story to myself. In fact, it wasn't until about 2 years ago that I finally told the story to my husband, knowing he wouldn't doubt me. Actually, to my amazement, he told me it was his favorite story he'd ever heard. So when Lexi asked me to write a story, I figured this had to be my best one. 

Faith is like a seed; plant it in your heart. God will give the harvest at the appointed time.

... He said to them, "Because of your little faith. For truly, I say to you, if you have faith like a grain of mustard seed, you will say this mountain, 'Move from here to there,' and it will move, and nothing will be impossible for you." - Matthew 17:20